You too are Priceless! (Proverbs 31)

Mother’s Day originated in the early 1900s… in fact, this year (2014) marks the 100^th year of Mothers Day!

This holiday began with a woman named Anna Jarvis. Following her mother’s death, Anna birthed the concept of Mother’s Day as a way to honor her mother’s sacrifices. In 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a degree that officially added Mother’s Day to the American calendar. However, as merchants and advertisers capitalized on the popularity of this day, Anna saw the vision of honoring mothers, becoming commercialized and tainted.

 Anna spent the later part of her life trying to remove this commercialization… Anna said: “A printed card means nothing except that you are too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone in the world.”

Wow! Mom, I really hope you still like my printed card after that. Anyways, I don’t think Anna meant we shouldn’t buy our mother a card, what she meant was that many of us take our mothers for granted… and it made her sick to watch as America used this special day as a way to capitalize on making a profit. That was never her intent.

According to Wikipedia, Anna Jarvis was a woman defined by her faith. Reading this I couldn’t help but wonder what her mother was like? Today, as we look at Proverbs 31, I wonder if this was the type of woman Anna’s mother was?

For those of you who have previously studied this chapter, you may have some varied ideas about the woman portrayed. When I first read this text my initial thought was “I feel so inadequate to teach this message: I am far from perfect, nor am I a wife or mother.” My other though was how do I relate this text to a group of Singles? Especially to the guys?

Although we are celebrating Mother’s Day, I believe the Lord has called all Christians (even the men) to have motherly characteristics in the way we interact with others. A mother is kind, patient, wise, loving, sensitive, and helpful.

Man/woman/single/or married- no matter who you are- the proverbs 31 woman should inspire you to live a life that honors the Lord.

So let’s turn to Proverbs 31, starting with verse 10.

Proverbs 31: 10- 12: Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?  She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She finds wool and flax and busily spins it. She is like a merchant’s ship, bringing her food from afar. She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household and plan the day’s work for her servant girls.

We see the rarity of an excellent wife. This woman cannot be purchased- she is worth more than any worldly good because she enriches her family’s life more than anything.

This woman is not afraid to get her hands dirty. She does not sit by idly, but she is always doing things that support her family. This woman even puts the health of her husband and children above her own. In the same way, we should put the well-being of others before our own.

I remember growing up my mother always wanting us to try some new health fad… although most of these were ridiculous- and we may have teased her about all the crazy things she would read or ask us to try- I truly believe in her heart was genuine care and concern for our well-being. She wanted us to look and feel our best!

Let’s continue with the next three verses: (v.16-18)

Proverbs 31: 16-18- She goes to inspect a field and buys it; with her earnings she plants a vineyard. She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. She makes sure her dealings are profitable; her lamp burns late into the night.

This woman does not sit around expecting to be waited on but rather she jumps to prepare for her family’s needs. A mother’s role may look different from family to family… but in my house my mother wore several hats. I began to think about all the things my mother has done over the years and I asked myself…

*What would it cost to employ someone to fulfill her role? What would that job description be? The answer: she is irreplaceable. Not because she was perfect, but because she placed the Lord first, her family second, and herself last.

As Christians- (single, married, man or woman), this perfect woman gives us an example of how we too should live. Even though we are not a wife or mother, a husband or father- this does not mean we are not worth as much. That is the biggest lie! Although we celebrate Mother’s Day, God is not asking “Are you a mother?” but rather, He is asks “are you a child?” and “am I your father?”

If the answer is yes, then you too are priceless- Your heavenly father does not love you more or less for your relationship or family status… He loves you- no matter what! As his children we too have an irreplaceable value!

Going back to our text… Let’s skip to verse 23…

Proverbs 31: 23-27- Her husband is well known at the city gates, where he sits with the other civic leaders. She makes belted linen garments and sashes to sell to the merchants. She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness. She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.

This woman builds her loved ones up, her words are wise- she is guarded and does not speak unwisely. This is because she values her family’s reputation. Think about how much most mothers take care of… I’m sure many could complain all day, but this woman chooses to clothe herself and her family with dignity. She doesn’t allow her emotions to come out in the form of complaints. She doesn’t fear the future, but her trust is in the Lord. She is a confident and loving servant.

We need to start practicing this kind of attitude now, while we are single. It is guaranteed that Life will throw problems and issues our way. The older we get, it seems the bigger the issues and it takes great maturity to not complain and/or tell everyone about your problems. When I am troubled or in disagreement over something occurring in my life, I natural want to tell everyone because I want them to share in my struggles. But this is unwise… the proverbs 31 woman does not divulge her issues to everyone because she knows that may harm not only her own, but her family’s reputation.

Are you practicing this now? Do you wear your emotions and problems on your sleeves? I know I do this all the time! For me I think it is out of fear… I search for too many opinions or too many solutions to my problems.

These past couple of weeks as I have sought answers and advice, I have really tried to make the Lord my first counselor. He has shown me that His love casts out all fear! But when I don’t turn to Him, I turn to others because I am so afraid of doing something alone. This week God gave me Isaiah 41:13. It says:

“For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you!”

The proverbs 31 woman understands that the absence of problems is unrealistic; she embraces them with courage knowing that we have an eternity of problem free living in Heaven! She does not seek her heaven on earth. She understands that this world is not her home & these problems are only momentary.

No matter where we are in life, we can be confident that we are not alone! God is with us, He holds our hand, He empathizes with all of our issues- big or small. We don’t need anyone else’s empathy or opinion because we have the creator of the universe on our side! Not just knowing these things- but believing them is what makes someone reflect the characteristics shown in Proverbs 31.

Lets continue…

Proverbs 31: 25- 31
 Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her: “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all!” Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

I love that reminder…when we have our mind set on Christ, He makes us beautiful. However, if you are like me, you will so easily forget that. I look at Proverbs 31 and see an unattainable list of qualities. Maybe you too think: “I will never be that woman” or for the men you are simply thinking: “I will never be a woman.”

So in the time we have left, I want to connect this passage to our single life… or for you guys- to your “manly” lives!  I want to answer the question: “How can I become more like a Proverbs 31 woman, and how does this passage apply to me?”

Proverbs 31 was actually written as a Mother’s advice to her son. These were the ideal qualities she encouraged him to look for in a wife. The beginning of the chapter starts out by saying: “The sayings of King Lemuel--an inspired utterance his mother taught him.”

This mother cared so much about her son that she outlined the ideal woman … so actually this passage was intended for singles! Even though originally intended for men in search of a wife; it also provides an example for single ladies desiring a godly husband J

It is unknown who King Lemuel is, but some scholars believe this is actually King Solomon, thus the mother giving this advice would be Bathsheba. I do not have a seminary degree or any super spiritual knowledge, so don’t quote this as a fact… but if this is true, I find it rather refreshing. Bathsheba was known for scandal more than virtue (If you do not know the story of David and Bathsheba’s affair, I encourage you to reference the story in 2 Samuel chapter 11).

I bring this up to highlight one thing: No one is perfect- not even the woman giving this advice… she could never attain all the Proverbs 31 Characteristics on her own… No one can be this woman without placing their life in the Lord.

I like this quote: I tried to do so many things for God that I missed being with God. But I've learned—the hard way—life isn't about keeping it all together. It's about trusting the One who can. —Nicole Johnson

As we think about all these perfect qualities, I want you to keep in mind- you will never be perfect and you will never find the perfect spouse. But when we give Christ control, He will put everything together. Through him we will display and attract proverbs 31 characteristics.

(LL) Colossians 1:20 says- Through him God reconciled everything to himself. He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth by means of Christ’s blood on the cross.

(LL) 2 Corinthians 12:9 says- "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.

Scripture is clear- our weaknesses are reconciled and brought to perfection through submission. When we lay our weaknesses at the cross, his blood covers us and makes us appear perfect to the Father.

Although we do not have to be perfect, we should still want to live a life that reflects Christ’s perfection. What makes the proverbs 31 woman so significant is not that she appears to have it all together, but it is because she fears the Lord.

Her perfection does not stem from her skills or accomplishments, it stems from her heart. Just like this woman, our “perfection” is not our own- but it belongs to the one who owns our soul. We are a product of God… that is the only perfect thing about us.

I was blessed to have a mother who is a pretty close to perfect. Just like the Proverbs 31 woman, my mother is: Compassionate, Diligent, Wise, Kind, and most of all she is a Servant. I know many of you would say these things about your mother, but I am convinced my mom has more love than any woman in the world… (ok I might be a little biased)

When I think of all the sacrifices she made for me and our family, I am amazed- she is superwoman! This was not an easy calling, but my mom would give her life for any of her children or her husband. She is a proverbs 31 woman.

Looking at her life, gives me an example to follow. She has taught me how to be more loving and patient with others and now as I look to her more as a friend, she shows me that this kind of love is the same kind of love I should give others.