Monday, May 13, 2013

Refute Means Love?


I’m sure most of you at some point have been completely humiliated by something a parent, sibling, or close friend has said. Most of us would agree, “Honesty is the best policy;” However, we may recall a time when we wished someone had been a little less honest.

In College, after I had been dating a guy for a couple months, I wanted to introduce him to my parents. Most people say my parents are extremely friendly, and they have always taken an interest in the people I hangout with; so I really didn't think this was a big deal. Anyways, my dad told me after the introduction, he was going to take my boyfriend out for coffee. I should have known better than to let this outing occur on their very first meeting, but at the time I really didn't think anything of it. So soon after their first encounter, he and my dad went off to have, what I now refer to as: “the talk.”

When they came back from their heart to heart, I could instantly tell something bad had happened- My boyfriend looked as pale as a ghost and my dad just had this huge grin. For the rest of the day… and actually for a long time after their chat…. he seemed really uncomfortable when I came too close. So of course I started asking: “What did you and my dad talk about?” When I heard what my dad had said, I was absolutely mortified!

Apparently, my dad had said: “I want my daughter to have three things on her wedding day: 1) her faith in the Lord 2) Her sexual purity and 3) Me by her side. Now son, you can mess up two of these things. You can rob her physical purity, you can hinder her walk with Christ, BUT hear me out…. you can never take away my love for her! That being said, if I hear or suspect that you have in any way damaged either of the first two things- I will make sure you have a very difficult time finding a job and I will make sure you regret hurting my daughter!” For those of you who do not know my father, he is very involved at A&M’s business school… so this threat wasn’t taken too lightly. But anyways, when I heard this I was speechless, embarrassed, and a little angry that my dad would say those things. But now looking back, I realize he was verbalizing what he believed Christ wanted for my life and also what was best for his daughter. He wasn’t going to stand by and allow anyone or anything to come between my relationship with Christ.

Today as we look at Titus Chapter 1, Paul is going to encourage us to do exactly what my father did. Just like my dad established some standards for dating his daughter, Paul tells us in Titus, that as Christians, we have to set standards pleasing to God. If we fail to speak up and allow the grey areas to go unaddressed, then we are not winning the world, but rather: the world is winning us! - Even if we do not partake, but passively allow other believers to continue because we think “they may not like me if I address this situation.”

But this is a hard thing to do… most of us have been in a position where we knew a Christian friend was doing something that could potentially harm them, maybe not physically, but emotionally or spiritually; however, we failed to say anything. And for most of us that have failed, it was because we didn’t want to offend the other person, or we feared our honesty would ruin the friendship (Even though it was out of love and concern). But because we are called to be different, we shouldn’t be concerned with worldly acceptance. We should not be like the world- so we should not be ashamed of standing out:

2 Peter 2:11- Dear friends, I urge you, as foreigners and exiles, to abstain from sinful desires, which wage war against your soul.
John 15: 18-19 “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.
Philippians 3:20 “But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.”

In these three verses, we see that not everyone is going to like us or agree…. But that is ok, because this world is fading and one day our citizenship will be in Heaven. When we love others the way Christ loves us, people will think we are strange and peculiar. I don’t know about you, but if my words and actions could lead people to Christ- It would be worth letting people think I was weird.

So as we begin the book of Titus, I want us to get real and address some things that might not be the easiest to talk about. If I offend anyone or if you do not agree with the things I say- please do not think I am judging or saying I have it all together… Because God knows I DO NOT! I do however encourage each of you to dig into the word yourself. Make your own opinions about these matters, you don’t have to listen to what I say, I am human and I make mistakes, but God’s word is true- so use his word to form opinions. It is important that we follow Christ, not a Sunday school teacher, professor, or pastor- but Christ alone.

Turn with me to Titus 1.
Titus 1:1-3 Paul, a servant of God and an apostle of Jesus Christ to further the faith of God’s elect and their knowledge of the truth that leads to godliness- in the hope of eternal life, which God, who does not lie, promised before the beginning of time, and which now at his appointed season he has brought to light through the preaching entrusted to me by the command of God our Savior.

Paul opens this book (which is a letter written to Titus) stating 1) who he was and 2) the purpose God give him.
·         Who is Paul:
o   A servant of God and an apostle of Jesus Christ

·         Purpose God give him:
o   To increase the faith of God’s people
o   To expand the knowledge of truth
o   To advance Christ’s Kingdom - Paul reminds us in this introduction that our God, a God who cannot lie, has promised eternal life. So our focus should be on advancing Heaven by inviting more to join us…. Not advancing our earthly status.
o   NOW- I also want to point out the timing- “and which now at his appointed season he has brought to light through the preaching entrusted to me.

Now is our appointed time to encourage others to increase their faith and expand their knowledge.  

Titus 1:5 The reason I left you in Crete was that you might put in order what was left unfinished and appoint elders in every town, as I directed you. 

Paul had left Titus in Crete-, a place known for scandal- the people of Crete were compared to pirates. For the past few weeks we have been studying 1st & 2nd Timothy, which was written for the church of Ephesus. Paul’s instructions/encouragements to Timothy were very similar, which makes me believe that if Paul were writing to us today we could easily insert Houston as the location. Titus 1:5 could say: “The reason you are in Houston, the reason you work at EP Energy, the reason you are at Second- is to:

 1) Put in order what was left unfinished (Spread the gospel to non- believers)
2) To appoint elders (Create leaders within the church body)

Today we are going to focus more closely on the second instruction= building Christian leaders.

Titus 1:6-8 An elder must be blameless, faithful to his wife, a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.  Since an overseer manages God’s household, he must be blameless—not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. Rather, he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good, who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined.  

Christian Leaders must not be:
·         Overbearing
·         Quick-tempered
·         A drunk
·         Violent
·         Dishonest

Christian Leader must be:
·         Blameless
·         Faithful
·         Able and willing to be of good influence: A role model
·         Hospitable
·         Lovers of good
·         Self controlled
·         Disciplined

So now we know the qualities of a Christian Leader… but why must a leader posses these qualities? And what is their responsibility. Lets continue in the text...

 Titus 1:9-11: He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it. For there are many rebellious people, full of meaningless talk and deception, especially those of the circumcision group. They must be silenced, because they are disrupting whole households by teaching things they ought not to teach—and that for the sake of dishonest gain.

Paul warns Titus= what is going on in Crete is also going on inside the church body- the “Circumcision group.” This group is guilty, they think they have it all together but they are destructive and foolish. If we jump down to vs. 16 it says: They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.

So in these verses, Paul gives Titus some responsibilities as a Christian Leader:
Responsibilities of Christian Leaders:
1)      Hold firmly to the Trustworthy message
a.       In order to know the trustworthy message- we have got to be in the word
b.      We must educate ourselves in scripture
c.       Our spiritual growth MUST BE our #1 Priority

2)      Encourage others to live in Truth (sound doctrine)
a.       Again- we have to know what scripture says in order to do this.

3)     Refute those who oppose it!!! 

The third responsibility is the one many of us do not like to do….so lucky for us, this is the one we are going to focus on today. If number three isn’t something practiced in our church, in our class, in our small group, and amongst Christian communities, then the first two responsibilities will not be as powerful. They will begin to lose significance, become routine, and taken for granted. Ignoring this responsibility may also be an indication that Christ is not our first priority.

Now in order for me to address this issue, I have to make it clear, that this message is meant for the church body- or for individuals that claim Christ as their savior. I also have to admit that I am guilty of ignoring this responsibility. I don’t want to be the unpopular girl, I like being invited to all the social scenes and I like having tons of friends, so I kind of dance around this responsibility and think… “oh as long as I am living how Christ wants me to live, then others will see I am different and my witness can be through my love and actions- not my words. I catch myself asking who am I to address these things with her or him? I have a past… I too have been involved in things I shouldn’t have been… so surely God will use someone else…I mean wouldn’t it be hypocritical for me to tell them something is wrong when I have been guilty of similar things?? I think God just wants me to love them and invite them to church.”

I think this is false because we see throughout the bible: God has forgiven our past in order to share his grace and mercy with others.

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

            Going back to the instruction given to Titus to refute those who oppose the truth doesn’t mean condemn them and it doesn’t mean judge them. The Greek word for "refute" is epitimao- which oddly enough means to “put honor or importance upon something.” By refuting we are putting importance on accountability and also we are putting honor on a different set of choices. We can make godly statements by drawing attention to godliness.
We are to examine our own lives but then, as a body of believers, we are called to address these things in the lives of each other- not out of judgment or arrogance, but out of love!

If we go back to the first verse of our text, it tells us that: As a servant of God and an apostle of Jesus Christ, we are to: further the faith and knowledge of truth that leads to godliness—in the hope of eternal life.

To further God’s Kingdom, I have to live and SPEAK the truth. Sometimes I wonder if I really understand what that means…  Because I thought I did… but I really don’t know if I do, because if I did, then my words and my actions would look a WHOLE LOT DIFFERENT.

I sometimes catch myself thinking, well it is 2013… sex outside of marriage, homosexuality, abortion… (the list could continue)… those things have most definitely become acceptable outside the church, but sadly they are sometimes viewed acceptable even inside the church. ESPECIALLY IN SINGLE LIFE! So, if I verbalize my beliefs and stand for what is biblical, then it is basically guaranteed that no one outside the church walls will accept me, and actually many inside the church walls will think I am being narrow minded. So am I the one that is wrong? Do I need to modify my views to better align with the time?

Many people might say:  “You must become more like them in order to win them.” I sometimes believe this, but that is what Satan wants me to believe. Although you may think there is truth to the statement, I believe the true statement should be: “You must love them in order to win them.”

            We are to love all kinds of people: believers, non-believers, homosexuals, adulterous, drunks, liars… However, the way we love people isn’t by becoming like them or passively accepting their practices. We love them by sharing Christ with them. When we truly love others, the way Christ calls us to love others, their joy & the benefits Christ wants to share with them become more important than what they think about us.

1 Cor. 6:9-11: Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

In this passage, it is clear that our sins can keep us from eternal life with Christ; however we should not be discouraged because in verse 11 it says: “That is where you WERE- but you WERE washed, sanctified, & justified.” Shouldn’t we want to share this kind of grace & mercy with others?

Thinking of Single life, I know many of us struggle in these “grey areas;” however, none of us really wants to address them. A lot of these things get swept under the rug. One topic in particular, that I think our age group probably struggles most with, is premarital sex. Since our church just wrapped up a series on sex I guess it is appropriate to go there…but I really hoped I would never have to talk this issue in a room full of young adults- so I keep it brief.
I believe God designed sex for marriage in order to protect us. Many will say: “We love each other, we are going to get married eventually, we are physically attracted to each other, and Girl don’t you know it is 2013?”

            Well I mean, that is kind of a valid point. This world, your friends, your co-workers, maybe even your parents will have arguments that sound reasonable. As a Christian community, if we are not diving into God’s word, if we are not encouraging each other, and if we are not keeping each other accountable, then we might begin to change our views. When we are not in scripture and when our eyes are not on Christ’s kingdom, then we can easily be enticed by the ways of the world.

Also, When I dig into scripture, when our other teachers: Will and Jarred dig into scripture, when Lindsey, Rachel, or the other small group leaders dig into scripture, it isn’t only for our own sake, but for the sake of people in this class and other believers. When scripture is a priority in our lives, we can encourage someone who is struggling in this area. We can lead others to verses like the one we just read in 1 Corinthians, explaining that Christ wants to wash us clean! But we can also look at scriptures that explain why we are given specific instructions: look at 1 Thessalonians 4 (vs. 4-8)

1 Thessalonians 4: 4-8
“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human being but God, the very God who gives you his Holy Spirit.

 By knowing and reading these verses we can share that God wants us to learn while we are single, how to possess & control our bodies. God knows that as single adults, we have a desire to be sexually active- and we see in 1 cor. That we can be forgiven for our mistakes; however, God wants us to learn RIGHT NOW- how to control our passions! So as we learn how to say no to our flesh, it will preserve us for marriage. If we don’t learn how to control our flesh or our worldly passions as singles, then we will never be able to A) put Christ above our own desires or B) put our spouse (or others) above ourselves.

As a class, as a body of Christ, this is what fellowship looks like. Paul tells us to focus on the wonderful treasures of living in Christ. I am very confident that HIS blessing whether it be here on earth or in heaven, His blessing will be FAR better than whatever fun this world offers. Don’t yall want to be part of a community that practices fellowship like that- a community that is more concerned with God’s eternal gifts than the temporary pleasures of this world?

This concept applies to any “grey area.” Whatever we might be involved in- it is time to first address it in our own lives, but then share this kind of freedom with the body of Christ. Lets not allow the world win us, but we should live for the Truth- so that we can win the world!!

For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven. 2 Corinthians 5:1

This verse basically wraps up our lesson today. If our earthly tent is destroyed- meaning we don’t see all the pleasures and rewards of this world, it is OK! All this world has to offer is a temporary tent. But God is building us an eternal mansion that will last forever! So what are you going to live for? A temporary tent or an eternal mansion? 

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